End of week 3 of yoga teacher training. I am finding the "flow" a little easier this week. I've realized that I truly need to start adding time actually practicing my teaching - writing and saying the scripts, taping myself and watching the videos so I can revise and refine as needed. I've been able to wing it in the practicums so far, and I know that as we get further into it that isn't go to work for me. I am starting to freak out a little about how much there is to do and how little time there is left to do it. Then I take a deep breath and remind myself that I just need to focus on what I'm doing right now.
I did download a metronome app per the suggestion of the instructors. I'm also going to breakdown the script much the same way we breakdown a pose. Working on the individual pieces rather than all of it at once. This is where the metronome will come in handy - practicing just the breathing cues, then the Sanskrit names, then putting those together, then adding in postural cues. The more I learn, the more I realize just how much work instructors have to do. They make it look so easy!
Comparing myself to others or judging myself just makes me miserable. I laugh at myself when I fall out of a pose because it's fun to attempt something, and sometimes it's even funny. I'm learning to forgive myself for my so-called mistakes, shortcomings, insecurities. Reminding myself that I'm not "perfect" and being ok with that is a new concept for me. (See my earlier post about chasing perfectionism.)
All I can do is just keep moving forward. If I fall down, just get up and give it another shot. Whether that's a yoga pose, a goal, a relationship, or anything else, just keep going for it. I'll either get it or I won't, and I'll have learned something about myself in the meantime.
It's the end of week 3, and I'm once again "behind" in my studies and that's ok. I've finally starting listening to lessons while I'm on my walk in the morning, which is helping. I also figured out that it was easier for me to do all of the week's reading assignments in one shot rather, than at the beginning of each day. Flexibility - that's what yoga is all about, right?